Embodiment: principles & practice of bare-chestedness

I touched on this subject in an earlier post about wearing black, when I commented on the sexualisation of bare-chestedness in the 1990s, with models such as Marky Mark. I was in two minds about posting about it again, but we're actually having the hottest summer we've had for several years, which has revealed an ironic truth to me: when you wear black literally all the time, what you end up doing in the summer is wearing much less in the way of clothes. Strange irony, as a priest of a dark Goddess, to wear black to mirror her yet end up half-naked as a result. I for one think she is splitting her sides laughing.

The real subject of this post is this: it seems that on one extreme there are men who see no issue at all with baring their chest. On the other extreme are men who simply will or cannot, obviously with a lot of potential for different personal opinions in the middle. In case the relevance of this to witchcraft is not clear it is this: we practise a religion in which we believe we embody divinity, because for us the division between what is divine & what is not, is not so clear as it is in some other religions. This is doubtless partly the reason why ritual nudity is the sign of ritual priestly power in some Wiccan denominations.

I'm not a great one for nudity myself, although I'm not overly bothered by ritual nudity or naturism for those who like that sort of thing. I can't think how women don't laugh when they see a naked man - although I'm informed they do inwardly - & it seems to me that nudity leaves sensitive parts of the body more vulnerable than they need be. I'm told naturists don't eat fried food, I don't know how true this is, surely even naturists would wear aprons for protective reasons. The issue of whether women should be allowed to go topless is another thorny one: I have had some women tell me that it is uncomfortable for them to be without a bra, which to me would be a perfectly sensible sovereign reason not to do it.

I have read anecdotal evidence online that well within living memory, for a man to be topless wasn't nearly such a big(ger) deal as it is now. My observation suggests that it is a working class thing - obviously only observed here in Britain. Maybe there is a greater tradition of being topless for men as a result of having jobs where you would work topless in the summer, you'd get used to being topless & it would become part of your normal life.

What is genuinely very dangerous is the tradition of letting boys be bare-chested while adults are not: that can create a ticking time-bomb of skin cancer in later life. I have a certain sympathy for free radicals myself, but I would expect a witch audience to be sassy enough to know that hat, dark glasses, & sunscreen are good.

Nor does bare-chestedness need to be sexual, at least in the sense that no shirt is not the same as exposing your genitals. It shows a Victorian prurience & lack of imagination to equate a bare chest with indecent exposure, right up there with shrouding the table legs because they were too suggestive. Of course a chest *can* be a very sexual part of the body, I mean, I personally have a bit of a thing for the back of the neck, but I wouldn't expect them all to be covered up!

Actually this brings me nicely to the second crux of this matter from a witch's point of view: let's be plain that only a very small proportion of men will ever look like Abercrombie & Fitch models. Personally I wouldn't want to, the evidence is conflicting but I can't think it healthy to have that little body fat. Never mind the continual hunger.

The crux is this: some men can't bare their chests because they are so uncomfortable with their own bodies. I have read of men who can't bring themselves to take their top off in front of their wives & girlfriends, they have such cripplingly bad self-image.

That to me is a real problem. It doesn't help that it sounds creepy to say that starting to bare your chest will make you feel good & improve your self esteem, but I think it can. The witchy way of going about this would be to do a little at a time, perhaps casting spells on yourself as you go, until you've attained to the level of bare-chestedness that you are comfortable with.

This is certainly my experience. My mother had obviously read a book called something along the lines of How to Fuck Them up for Life, because she has always tried to be over-intimate with me. All mothers make embarrassing comments, but touching, especially when your son specifically tells you not to, is another thing. As a child this, combined with not being sporty & continually placed in milieux that would encourage me not to be sporty, created a shyness that it took me ages to get over.

Mothers, keep off your son's backs, I mean this in all respect. You will merely push a son away by suffocating him, & give him further problems. There should be no...I can't think of a word to describe what I mean, so I'll make up the word para-sexual, since that is exactly what I mean, overtones to a parent-child relationship.

I'm not personally shy now. This has been one of the benefits of cutting the ties of my toxic family over the past decade. I'm in a position where I can have people who matter to me see me bare-chested without curling up in embarrassment. In hot weather you will very rarely find me wearing a shirt around the house. This is for comfort reasons, nothing else. Similarly I will be bare-chested when out & about for comfort, when socially acceptable. If I think it's not OK I'll either ask or just not take it off. After all, as witches cultivating divine embodiment this means respecting other people's bodies, especially where we end & they begin!

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