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Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Thursday, May 21, 2020

146,668 Page Views Guest Post by Evelyn Waugh

It has been far too long since we had a guest post, which I have been accustomed to commission when the blog's page views reached some round figure. Since the all-time page view count currently stands at 146,668, which is miniscule by some blog's standards but this blog does not seek popularity and that is a very round figure indeed, it is time for another guest post. They are usually by somebody dead or fictional, and this is no exception, since it is by Evelyn Waugh and comes from a letter of his dated 31st May 1942.
'[...] No. 3 [Commando] were very anxious to be chums with Lord Glasgow, so they offered to blow up an old tree stump for him and he was very grateful and he said dont spoil the plantation of young trees near it because that is the apple of my eye and they said no of course not we can blow a tree down so that it falls on a sixpence and Lord Glasgow said goodness you are clever and he asked them all to luncheon for the great explosion. So Col. Durnford-Slater D.S.O. said to his subaltern, have you put enough explosive in the tree. Yes, sir, 75 lbs. Is that enough? Yes sir I worked it out by mathematics it is exactly right. Well better put a bit more. Very good sir.
'And when Col. D. Slater D.S.O. had had his port he sent for the subaltern and said said subaltern better put a bit more explosive in that tree. I don't want to dissapoint Lord Glasgow. Very good sir.
'Then they all went out to see the explosion and Col. D.S. D.S.O. said you will see that tree fall flat at just that angle where it will hurt no young trees and Lord Glasgow said goodness you are clever.
'So soon they lit the fuse and waited for the explosion and presently the tree, instead of falling quietly sideways, rose 50 feet into the air taking with it 1/2 acre of soil and the whole of the young plantation.
'And the subaltern said said Sir I made a mistake, it should have been 7 1/2 lbs not 75.
'Lord Glasgow was so upset he walked in dead silence back to his castle and when they came to the turn of the frive in sight of his castle what should they find but that every pane of glass in the building was broken.
'So Lord Glasgow gave a little cry & ran to hide his emotion in the lavatrory and there when he pulled the plug the entire ceiling, loosened by the explosion, fell on his head.
'This is quite true.'
Mary Amory (editor): The Letters of Evelyn Waugh. New Haven and New York: Ticknor and Fields, 1980, p. 161.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Shrines

The witchcraft movement  with our great tradition of stealing any practice that isn't nailed down, has not been slow to go with the traditions of pilgrimage and shrines. This is not too far from our custom of visiting each other or meeting in moots. Of course we tell the outside world that this is to check in, make sure others are OK, and for networking. But of course it has a deeper purpose, of gossip, bitching and backstabbing.
Sadly some of our people are beyond the veil but we continue to commune with their memories and the residue of their acts. There are even some people who are legendary and this post was inspired by a colleague telling me she wants to visit Derek Jarman's house. This post is about the shrine of another great, but her simple presence speaks to power so I will not speak further except to draw the reader's attention to the parallel of the great Marie Laveau's tomb.
Tomb reputed to be that
of Marie Laveau
The canonisation of Derek Jarman 





Saturday, May 9, 2020

Dysfunctional Families: What I Have Learnt

Regular readers will know that things have not been OK between my mother and myself for years. The situation has now changed because last month she succumbed to coronavirus. This post is a summing up, since I have seen that my comments have been helpful to readers in a similar situation.
1. People don't understand this unless they are in a similar situation. They will tell you that you should focus on the good memories, and don't understand that a dysfunctional parent sours what you thought were good memories.
2. There is no point trying to explain this to people. I made a point of not going round friends and family bitching about my mother (which she didn't hesitate to do about me). In retrospect this was the right thing to do. Don't try to explain it, you will know if they're ready to hear it.
3. People who get it will give socially inappropriate responses for example my friend who merely said 'Thank fuck for that'.
4. The rest of the family won't hesitate to come out of the woodwork after a death, even if they have given you the cold shoulder for years. Don't be taken in - they may not know what the last will says and will be eager to make everything up with you in case.
5. Blood is not thicker than water. If you have been estranged from your family this will be for a reason and you will know yourself if it is a good reason. When somebody is out of your life, yes you miss them but you also can see what your life is like without them, and if it is better the decision embeds itself.
6. If you are executor or legatee in a difficult family situation, do it properly with a solicitor. Dealing with an estate is a complex matter and having solicitors sort it will help against any challenges to the will. This is not even being histrionic - these people are ghouls.
7. Don't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to.
And finally...
8. There will be divine signs or the synchronicities that we witches look for anyway.

Tuesday, May 5, 2020

Blockages in Tarot Reading

I have been reading tarot cards for twenty years and it only struck me yesterday that when we get a blockage in a reading - when nothing makes sense - that blockage is itself part of the reading.
If you are reading for yourself it can be a matter that you need to think about or simply something which it is not for us to understand at this time. It can be approached a similar way if reading for someone else.
The old tradition of fortune telling may be useful here - for example the card(s) may show a person or behaviour which will be needed in the future so of course we don't recognise it now.
I am so thick sometimes.

Friday, May 1, 2020

May is Masturbation Month

It is actually scary how it has come round so quickly but this is the month to celebrate one of my favourite things, which is masturbation. It is especially significant this year since so many people are in isolation and it is a safe way to get off. Coronavirus is of course transmitted by water and when it comes into contact with a mucous membrane, it can be passed that way.
I am afraid that I haven't made any specific preparations for May this year - last year I stocked up on new porn specifically to wank to in May, but I have been nowhere near that organised this year.
Of course as a prolific user of porn anyway, it's not like I'm exactly lacking in that area. Recently I have discovered that all the exhibitionists from Tumblr have migrated to Twitter so I have found much good stuff there. I will also happily admit that I have at times used straight porn - always with men in, I am gay after all. I like the filthy porn made by Alexxa Vice - as wank material I can dream of being her, and frankly she shows me what I would have been like if a woman.