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Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Urban Grimoire: The Witch Diet

In which the Hound gives details for a spell to improve self-esteem, assist people to eat the best for them, reducing fretting about food & improving health. Disclaimer: if you have *any* medical problems at all or if your weight is objectively high or low, follow your own health professional's advice. My instinct is that it won't differ greatly from the general principles I'm going to give here, but the whole point of being a witch is autonomy as an individual, isn't it?

The Problem
We live in a world which is divorced from itself. A small proportion of people own the majority of the wealth. A dichotomy exists between a frequent valuing of being overweight (as a sign of health & prosperity) in poorer cultures, & an over-valuing of thinness in richer cultures. It is only right that this should appear on a city-based witch's blog, because the reality is city people are disconnected from the sources & nature of the food they eat. Nobody really lives (in the Western world, at least) according to the agricultural rhythms of the past, leading to a nostalgia for that - often romanticised - past & the growth of neo-Paganism. Coupled with this is the growth of a *huge* diet industry, & yet strangely we're also in the middle of an obesity epidemic. There's clearly something very strange here. I myself couldn't begin to tell you when things are in season (apart from when they get cheaper in shops), & I notice in the fridge I've got onions & peppers from 'Britain' (wherever that means), blueberries from Spain, & the milk is Polish.

Some of the odd things going on
People eat without reference to their own body's needs (for example following one-size-fits-all diet recommendations). Sounds pretty freaky, when it's put like that, doesn't it?
People are so out of touch with their own needs that they 'forget to eat'.
People fetishize weight gain - as in feeders or gainers. Now I like a man to have a bit of flesh on him, but obesity as a fetish is just weird.
People repeatedly go on different diets, despite the simple fact that dieting makes you put weight on.
People get fundamentalist about having to have some foods (such as 'superfoods') & avoid others.

Things to be wary of
Any diet plan that is prescriptive without reference to your body's needs.
Any diet plan that aims to send your body into starvation even temporarily (that is pretty well all of them).
Any diet plan that does not recommend simple balanced, varied, regular eating.
Any diet plan that emphasises certain 'superfoods'.
Any diet plan with numbers in the title (creating confusion), periods of fasting, anything like that.
Demonising certain foods (or even food groups) as 'bad' & disallowing them.
'Portion sizes' determined without reference to the needs of the person eating.

Some facts about nutrition & weight
How metabolism really works: assuming you are eating a sensible balanced, varied diet, as you eat more, your metabolism increases. Therefore for many people weight loss will mean eating more, just changing the proportions of what they eat. Some people have a naturally fast metabolism. (Most diets 'work' at first by causing starvation or confusion, & hence cannot work in the long run)
We all have a particular body shape that is biologically determined. Any attempt to escape from this is doomed to failure, or in the long term, serious illness.
It is also theorised that we have a 'set point weight' that is our natural weight & once again attempts to escape from that are doomed.
The most healthy way to eat in the long term is always a healthy, balanced, sufficient, & varied diet. On/off bouts of fads & diets confuse the metabolism & ultimately will lead to weight gain. Remember, you're getting this advice for free. I have *nothing* to gain from this, apart from the satisfaction of helping to free the world from quack diet merchants.

Aim of the spell
To be free of obsessive dieting.
To improve self-esteem.
To eat healthily.
To improve long-term health.
To improve the connection with ones own body needs.
THE SPELL (got there in the end)
Look at yourself in the mirror every morning & tell yourself that you love yourself. Make it as simple or ritualistic as you like, but *believe it*. As you grow in the love of yourself you will improve your care of yourself. If some people treated an animal the way they treat themselves, they'd be banned from keeping animals.
Eat when you start to get hungry, eat until you feel full & then stop. If you find you 'forget to eat', eat every few hours: this should improve your connection to your body's signals in itself. Both of these approaches should equate to eating every few hours, ideally with three meals & three 'snacks' in between.
Eat foodstuffs in the proportions shown in the plate that illustrates this post, aiming to balance the proportions daily. There's a slightly different illustration used in the US, but the guidelines won't differ greatly.
Vary what you eat within each foodgroup. Avoid eating the same things over & over, or avoiding some foodstuffs completely.
You *must* have 'treats'. Notice how fats & sugars appear on the plate: just in their proportion. If you don't have nice things to eat you'll feel you're depriving yourself & it will become a chore.
If you start craving particular foodstuffs, make sure to include those in moderation. Bodies have this wonderful way of telling us what we need.
If you don't follow this at some point, don't fret over it, just carry on from there.

Three special cases
Weight & metabolism are influenced in particular ways by alcohol & smoking. There is no safe limit for smoking, but it increases your metabolism so smokers tend to weigh less. If you stop you'll likely put weight on, but smoking is so dangerous I think you're probably better focussing on stopping, then dealing with the aftermath. Because of the cell mutations it takes many years for them to mutate back, but the weight gain is said to last a years maximum, then when you feel ready to make even more positive changes in your life in your diet you can.
Alcohol also can cause weight gain. I think probably the witch way to approach any addictive substance is a full & frank account of how we actually use that substance. This wouldn't be a not at all substance.
Another substance that we can/must have is sugar. The problem with sugar is the quantity: especially as it's hidden in so many foods. Its long-term effects are not that dissimilar to alcohol, but it's one to keep an eye out for, because it's another major cause of obesity & illness.
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