Urban Grimoire: Modern Wart Cunning & My Unexpected Ability at Healing

I have a (to me) unexpected ability at healing. I suspect the fact a friend routinely turns to me for pain relief & I recently correctly diagnosed both the problem & the treatment for another friend on the other side of the world, is the universe trying to tell me something. OK, I get it, I'm good at healing!

Healing has a bad reputation. To me it is the province of white lighters, new agers, & fell-good fluffbunnies, & that's not me. Of course the reason for that is that what they're on to is not proper healing. Proper healing is restoring homeostasis, & frequently forcibly removing a disease process. That is why much medical healing still takes the form of surgery: it's the totally sound principle that if something is causing you pain or may 'bring you down' or even kill you, & will not resort to other treatment, it must be removed.

A friend laughingly refers to my healing ministry. What she means by this is that when I've slept with someone I can often get startling insights into his emotional state or even physical health. Sex isn't always necessary to this but it helps!

Warts & verrucas have been a traditional province of the witch, being total buggers to get rid of. Disclaimer: this does not apply to warts in the genital, anal, or facial area. Disclaimer (2): I can't do the giving them to someone else thing, & if anyone can teach me I'd dearly love to be able to, I even have a list of suitable subjects.

Aim of this spell:

1. To remove a wart or verruca.

2. To practice the exercise of sheer dogged will power.

Mental state:

Sheer persistence. The attitude of brooking no interference or even the slightest possibility of failure really is necessary here.

There's another one though: *know* that your wart or verruca is going. I feel dealing with one of these little bastards is probably the best training a young witch could ever have: apparently people tend to give up after a short while of treatment. Darlings, I have a spell that's been going on for 20 years: sometimes I do something new but I *know* its results are manifesting on the earth plane.

Totem animal to invoke:

The spirit of the cockroach (carry on for millenia resisting all attempts at extermination & even nuclear disasters) would be appropriate here.

Assistants:

For this spell it really does help to have the assistance of a chiropodist if it is verrucas you're dealing with. Sorry, but there's no way anyone is ever going to be able to do the sort of cutting away of dead tissue that will be necessary, for themselves. The assistance of a chiropodist will dramatically speed up the spell.

Time:

Might as well start immediately when you've got the ingredients assembled, since it will take some time.

Ingredients:

A number of cheap emery boards. Treat them as disposable so you don't reinfect yourself: verrucas are wildly catching.

A verruca/wart removal preparation. This is my sort of healing, proper old school medicine. For minor ones gaffer tape might work. The herbalists recommend juniper oil (I think the only way to consume juniper is with tonic). Apart from these there are two main methods: freezing (with a spray, follow the instructions) or salicylic acid. This is my preferred method personally, not because of the previous plant-based way it was obtained, but because the way it works makes sense to me. It works by irritation. This makes the nervous system notice the wart or verruca & eject it by growing new tissue underneath. This is proper old-school medicine. It also reflects a true understanding that some healing means regrowing healthy tissue & so will take time. One brand name is Salactol. There are also some wussy brands around. 7% won't do it, did I say you have to kick ass with warts & verrucas?

Frequency of the ritual:

Every day. No really. No excuses. This is why you just invoked the invincible spirit of cockroach. You have to do this every day. One a day. The only exception being if you damage your surrounding skin with the acid, give it a day off to recover.

The ritual:

Wash your hands.

Have a good soak of the place the wart or verruca is.

Dry it (with a towel used only by you).

Scrape away any dry skin from the surface of the wart or verruca with an emery board.

Follow the instructions on your preparation.

Put a plaster over it.

Wash your hands.

Repeat next day.

How to know you're getting progress:

The wart or verruca will move slightly & will *slowly* become less raised, or if it's inside the surface of your foot its area will reduce as it comes up to the surface. There isn't really a way of speeding this up beyond a chiropodist cutting away at it for you.

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