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Sunday, March 2, 2014

The Hanged Man at Home

The picture is not of a tree, it's actually of a bird's nest on a telegraph pole in the driest part of South Africa; needless to say I've forgotten the name of the place.
My year card for this year is The Hanged Man, worked out the Tarot School of New York way. How that card gives me problems: my bull-at-a-gate personality baulks at the 'suspension' involved in this card. I would much rather me up & at it.
The particular way this is manifesting in my life this year is that I am going to move house. I have lived in Bearwood, to the west of Birmingham, for years; I never wanted a house but had to have one to be near my mother, but am now intent on living in a shoebox in a place not dictated by someone else. The one thing stopping this happening is my poor old ginger tom cat who has had renal failure for a year: I am going to auction my house & rent for a bit so I can't really take a cat with me & anyway I couldn't face uprooting him at his age, so I am going to move when he dies.
This necessitates the suspension of the Hanged Man: I have actually gone as far as having a clear out with a view to moving & earmarked the furniture to get rid of, but am unable to go ahead with the actual move. This pause has caused me to notice what *else* happens while the Hanged Man is suspended: he descends into the earth & all sorts of things readjust independently of him, until the next phase can start. In particular I'm finding that psychically I have already moved. Of course I'm ending some of the ties in Bearwood myself, but others are just ending without me doing anything: the spirit of place is withdrawing from me.
Meanwhile I'm making new ties. The place I want to live in is near where I used to go cruising years ago: it feels like the spirit of place there has never really let go of me. The obvious place recently for a spell was the River Rea, & in a recent week off, I found that everywhere I went was based on the city centre. I went nowhere in the Black Country at all. Psychically I have already moved.
Meanwhile I'm obviously learning the lesson of the Hanged Man, because actually the wait isn't bothering me. It is out of respect for the most meaningful relationship of my life, & waiting is the least I can do.
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